A Colorful Romance
by myrrhmonkey96
Summary: The life and love of Remus Lupin and Lily Evans has always been... well, interesting.  My entry for Rosalie'sRevenge's OPI Competition.
1. Who Needs A Prince?

Disclaimer: Not mine.

**A/N: This is my entry for Rosalie'sRevenge's OPI competition - a series of various snapshots in the relationship between Remus and Lily.**

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><p><span>Who Needs a Prince?<span>

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><p>Lily Evans had always loved fairytales. The idyllic life of the characters, the happily ever after endings, the magic and the fantastic beasts, the heroism and the love… Even now, at the age of sixteen, she still could often be found during her free time, curled up by the fire, immersed in a book of fairytales.<p>

Her friends didn't understand the appeal. "You can do magic," they'd say. "You've seen a unicorn! What's so great about reading some Muggle version of what they think it looks like?"

Yes, Lily would silently agree, some of the fantasy was gone now. These things were no longer the far-off, imaginative dreams of her childhood; they were now a part of her everyday life. But still, Lily read on.

See, there was more to fairytales than magic wands and goblins. Lily was never a "damsel-in-distress" type – she figured she was more of the" I'll-fight-my-own-damn-way-through-and-I-don't-need-any-help-from-the-likes-of-you-you-arrogant-pillock" type - then again, that may have had something to do with James Potter-, but she was a stickler for romance and chivalry. For as long as she could remember, she had eagerly awaited the day when a handsome prince would come sweep her off her feet and ride off with her into the sunset. Metaphorically, of course.

He didn't have to be royalty, of course. And he didn't have to literally pick her up and plop her on a horse and gallop away with her. In fact, that sounded a lot like kidnap to her, and Lily wasn't exactly fond of the idea of being kidnapped, Stockholm syndrome be damned. But she had always wanted to meet The Guy. The one who would go out of his way for her, hold doors open for her, help her with her books. He would be humble but amazing, intelligent but down-to-earth, funny but kind. He would be tender and loving… He would be perfect. And they would fall in love and have a happily ever after.

Though, looking around the common room, princes seemed to be in short supply. Unless you counted spoiled prats that expect to be handed everything they desire in life (coughPottercough), that is. None of the boys in that room were kind enough, or smart enough, or… well, they just weren't The One. That or they were gay - oh, cruel, cruel irony.

"Hey, Evans!"

Lily snapped her book shut, annoyed at the disturbance. "No."

"But I didn't even-"

"The answer is no."

"But Evans!"

"Are you whining, Potter?"

"Come on, just one -"

"I just remembered, I need to go to the library. Good bye."

And with that, Lily grabbed her bag and book of fairytales and flounced out the door, leaving James Potter pouting behind her.

Truth was she didn't really need to go to the library. See, "going to the library" was Lily's favorite excuse when it came to James Potter. Potter called it "the library"; Lily called it "I'm getting the hell away from you and going somewhere I know you'll never set foot in." It was a good system.

Five minutes later, Lily entered the library and was bombarded by the smell of ink, dust, and old parchment. She made her way over to her favorite table in the back corner and set her things down before leaving to comb the shelves for some new reading material.

She pulled any book that struck her fancy, resulting in an odd conglomerate that piled far over her head. Deciding that thirty books was enough for one day, she wound her way through the maze of shelves, the books in her arms teetering precariously, threatening to fall upon her head at any moment.

This was exactly what happened a few moments later when a strong collision with something that felt rather like a brick wall knocked her to the ground, sending her books flying in every direction.

"Im so sorry!" cried a muffled voice from her left. Lily thought it may have been familiar, but with all the books surrounding her head muffling all distinctive noise, she couldn't be sure.

"Bloody hell…" Lily groaned, pushing the books off of her and attempting to sit up. "My head…" A large bump had formed at the top of her head where one of the larger books had hit her, and was throbbing painfully. She let off a stream of colorful, very creative swear words.

"Lily?" The male voice sounded incredulous, and a bit frightened. "Lily, I'm so sorry! I had a load of books in my hands and couldn't see where I was going. Are you alright?"

Lily looked up, still seeing stars, and tried to place the voice. "R-Remus?"

"Here, let me help you." He finished clearing the books off of her and helped her into a sitting position. "How do you feel?"

"Dizzy." She closed her eyes, trying to fend off the feeling of nausea that was coming. "My head's throbbing."

"Here." Lily heard him mutter something and instantly the pain and vertigo disappeared. "Better?"

"Much. How'd you do that?"

"I've had a lot of practice." He smiled bitterly.

"Thank you."

Lily suddenly realized just how close they were. He had knelt down on his knees beside her, his honey-colored eyes just inches away from her own. She could feel his breath tickle the hair across her forehead. They locked eyes and Lily felt herself leaning in, as if obeying some magnetic pull.

"Mr. Lupin! Miss Evans! I am _ashamed_!" a shrill voice cried from down the aisle.

"Oh damn," Lily breathed. "It's Pince."

Madam Pince, the school librarian, was charging towards them at an alarming speed, brandishing a feather duster violently in their faces. "You are the last people I ever expected to see defile the written word in such a way. And you, Miss Evans, such foul words will not be heard in presence of my books, do you understand me? You have disturbed the peace and damaged my books! Why, I have half a mind to throw you out this second! I am absolutely disgusted. What do you have to say for yourselves?"

Lily tried to speak, but nothing came out, save a tiny squeak. Madam Pince was rather terrifying when she was angry. She looked less like her usual vulture and more like a Chinese Fireball as she glared down at them.

"I'm very sorry, Madam," Remus said. He spoke softly, charm radiating from every syllable. "I was so eager to read all your marvelous books that I was walking very quickly and not paying attention to my surroundings, my mind being on all the amazing discoveries I would find within the pages. Likewise, Lily had such a large selection of literature piled in her arms that she could not see me foolishly barreling towards her. It's my fault, Madam Pince, I collided with her. I'm very sorry, ma'am. I will accept full punishment."

Lily blinked in surprise. What was he doing? Her disbelief strengthened ten-fold when Madam Pince smiled. Madam Pince _never_ smiled- this boy was a genius!

"Oh, that's quite all right, Mr. Lupin. There will be no need for punishment. Many a time in my life, I have been so focused on the written word that I neglect the outside world. Quite understandable. Enjoy your reading, children. But mind you put those books back where you found them!"

Lily, fighting the urge to gape openmouthed at the librarian's abrupt turnaround in behavior, merely nodded.

"Of course, Madam," Remus muttered, flashing Madam Pince a charming grin. The woman turned on her heel and walked back to her desk without so much as another word.

Lily stared at Remus in awe. "How did you–… That was-… I can't believe-…Thank you."

Remus gave her a disarming smile. "Anytime."

He began to pick up the fallen books, reading the titles aloud as he grabbed them.

"_The Brothers Grimm Anthology of Faerie Tales_; _Damsel in Distress – Classical Archetype or Chauvinistic Conspiracy?_; _Fractured Fairy Tales_; _The Tales of Beedle the Bard; Hans Christian Anderson - Fairy Tales and Stories_; _Prince Charming – Idol or Idiot?_;_Stories of Charles Perrault_; _Tales of the Greek Isles_; _Fairy Tales vs Personality Disorders_… Someone likes folktales…"

Lily blushed in embarrassment and began picking up the rest of the books as quickly as she could.

"Oh of course," Remus chuckled, holding up the last two books on the floor. "What collection of fairy tale books would be complete without _Hogwarts: A History_ and _Goblin Rebellions of the 1600s_?"

Lily flushed – equal parts humiliated and furious. "I-"

"I'm kidding." He smiled crookedly down at her. "I love these books too. I have a huge anthology of folk tales from around the world by my bed. James and Sirius had a field day first time they saw it; they'd never read muggle fairytales before."

He stood and offered her his large hand. "Here."

Lily took it – albeit hesitantly – and he helped her to her feet. "Thanks."

"Anytime." He shot her a smile, his amber eyes shining brightly through his shaggy fringe of brown hair. Lily felt her heart skip a beat.

He bent down to grab her pile of books, placing them on top of his. Lily protested, but Remus merely shrugged her words off, saying, "A man always carries the lady's books," and hoisted the tombs into his arms.

"But-"

"But nothing. You're at your usual place, right?"

Lily didn't have time to answer, as Remus was already making his way to the back table. She scurried after him, feeling incredibly stupid doing nothing as he carried her humongous selection of books in addition to all of his. Though, it was quite thoughtful of him, she thought to herself. And if the muscles in his arms were any proof, the weight couldn't have been too difficult for him. Were he not Remus, the sight may have been comical – the stack of books rose far above his head and teetered precariously with every few steps- but Remus executed the task with a form of gracefulness quite foreign to the ever-clumsy Lily.

Remus deposited the monumental stack onto the table and pulled out a chair, gesturing for Lily to take a seat. She bit her lip, unused to such expressions of chivalry, but sat nonetheless.

"Mind if I join you?"

"What? Of course not, please sit down!"

Remus smiled, sat, and pulled one of the books off the top of the stack. "Happy reading." He winked.

Lily blinked in surprise. Remus Lupin had just winked. At her. The day just kept getting stranger.

Slowly, still trying to get her mind around the events of the last fifteen minutes, Lily reached for _Prince Charming – Idol or Idiot? _and began trying to read. The effort was in vain, however, as she could not get her mind – or eyes – off of the young man in front of her.

"Chocolate?" he whispered after a while, breaking her out of her reverie.

She looked at him in shock, looking around quickly to check for Madam Pince. "In the library?"

Remus smiled mischievously and pulled out a large chocolate bar. "Where else? It always tastes better in the library." He broke off a piece, the crack of breaking chocolate very loud to Lily's anxious ears. "Here, dark chocolate, your favorite."

Lily took the offered chocolate, feeling very surprised. How did he know that? The chocolate was amazing, a bittersweet rush of deliciousness. Remus was right; it really did taste better in the library. "Thank you."

He smiled, licking some chocolate off of his bottom lip, and Lily suddenly felt very warm. He placed the candy bar in the middle of the table, in a place that was accessible to either of them but hidden from the eyes of Madam Pince. They each broke off another piece and returned to reading.

_What makes a prince? _Lily read._The typical Storybook Prince, interchangeable with the Knight in Shining Armor, is rich, and comes from a powerful family. He is tall and strong, as well as very brave. Often times, he is charged with the task of completing a quest or slaying a beast to win the maiden's heart. He is gallant and chivalrous, as well as well spoken. He is-_

It was pointless. Try as she might, Lily could not focus on the page before her. With a sigh, she broke off another piece of chocolate and let her mind wander_. It was stupid, really, for anyone to wait around for someone like this,_ Lily thought._ No man could ever be all the things mentioned in fairytales. The real Prince Charming, _she mused,_ is the one who will hold your hair back when you puke, let you stain his favorite shirt with mascara when you cry, and make you laugh when you've had a day from hell. Not the one who just puts you in fancy dresses and takes you to balls. Those literary princesses couldn't have had very happy ever-afters with a guy like that…_

She reached for another piece of chocolate, and started when she felt warm fingers brush her own. She looked up to see the Remus had also reached for the candy – the very last piece.

Remus smiled, but did not move his hand. Lily felt sparks tingling up and down her arm from the place where their skin touched. "You can have it."

"N-Nonsense," Lily stuttered, trying to regain control of her mind. "It's your chocolate, you have it."

"Ladies first."

"We'll share it."

"Fine." He grinned. "We'll share it."

They broke the piece in half and grabbed their portion. Lily didn't think she had ever eaten anything so delicious.

Remus smiled at her once more before returning to his book.

Suddenly, it clicked. How had Lily never noticed it before? How had she never noticed _him_ before?

Remus was not rich, she mused, taking in his slightly shabby robes, but what did that matter? His family may not be powerful, but they were kind; Lily had spoken with them on many occasions. He was, quite obviously, tall, strong, and ever-so-handsome, albeit in a humble, non-assuming, casual way. He had held her books for her and pulled her chair out for her, given her chocolate and saved her from the wrath of Madam Pince…

"Chocolate in the library?" a familiar voice shrieked.

_Speak of the devil,_ Lily thought. She and Remus grabbed their bags and jumped to their feet. Remus grabbed for her hand and pulled her towards the exit at a run.

"Out! Out! Out! And don't come back! I expected more of you! Do not touch my books, you leave them right there, safe from your filthy fingers! Out, I said, out!"

Madam Pince chased them out towards the library doors, enchanting her feather duster to follow after them, smacking them anywhere it could reach with all its might.

The hilarity of the moment, coupled with the taste of chocolate on her tongue and the feel of Remus' large, callused hand in her own, caught up to Lily and she began laughing hysterically. Soon, Remus was laughing as well as they pelted towards the door.

They reached it, quite out of breath, and Remus pulled the door open, holding it for Lily as she walked through.

_Who needs a prince?_ Lily thought, smiling breathlessly up at him. _I've got Remus._

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><p><strong>AN: Ta-da! This took me a while to write… How did you like it? Reviewers shall get a piece of Remus' famous chocolate*! Next up: Purple with a Purpose!**

*_chocolate-is-completely-virtual-and-imagined-within-your-mind-offer-expires-december-2012-due-to-theories-of-apocalypse-void-where-prohibited_


	2. Purple With A Purpose

Disclaimer: Not mine.

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><p><span>Purple with a Purpose<span>

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><p>Lily Evans was determined. And when she was determined… Well, Remus knew better than to stand in her way.<p>

She was charging her way across the Great Hall with purpose, hair flying behind her. Remus sighed. What had James done this time? How many times did he have to tell the idiot to stop asking her to Hogsmeade?

But she walked right past James.

Past Sirius.

Past Jonathan McLaggen.

Past Eileen Kelly and Grace Bellview.

Remus was confused. If it was none of the usual suspects, who-

She came to a stop.

Remus realized with terror that she was standing right in front of him.

She stared down at him, an emerald fire burning in her eyes.

Remus thought hard. _Bugger. What did I do? I left her chocolate well alone, I cleaned up all the ink I spilled on her Arithmancy homework before she even noticed, I turned in her library book that I borrowed, I did all my prefect rounds, I caught myself from telling her exactly how amazing she looks today in that purple shirt that hugs her curves oh-so-nicely, I stopped Peter from going through with Sirius' dare and stealing her underwear… What did I do? Think, Remus, think!_

"Lily, I-"

"Remus," she stated, crossing her arms. Remus waited for her to say something more, but she stayed silent.

"Um… Is everything okay?" he asked, trying to shove out of his mind the thoughts of how well that shirt fit her curves, and the way the purple made her red hair and green eyes shine even brighter. There were more important things to think about, like his imminent death by her hand. _But, Merlin, is she making it difficult. _Must_ she fold her arms that way? Is she _trying_ to torture me? Right at eye level… I'm a horrible person… Oh Merlin, did she just say something? Eyes up, Remus, eyes UP!_

"Sorry… I didn't catch that. What did you say?" Remus braced himself for the lecture he was sure to get after admitting that he hadn't been paying attention.

"I said… I said… Oh Merlin, I can't bring myself to say it again. It was hard enough the first time… And I was so determined to-… I only prepared to say it once, and now-…" She bit her lip, looking towards the heavens as if begging for assistance

"Lily?" He stood up cautiously, looking down at her in concern.

"I… Remus, I-… Oh to hell with it."

Remus had just barely registered her words when she suddenly threw her arms around his neck, jumped on her tiptoes, and kissed him fiercely.

Remus' eyes opened wide in shock. He stood frozen for a moment. This was most definitely _not_ what he had expected. _This is your chance, moron! Kiss her back, you daft dunderhead!_

Lily, misreading his shock for revulsion, pulled away, very red in the face. "I… I'm sorry. Remus, I-"

She had no time to finish her sentence, however, as Remus had grabbed her around the waist, pulled her up a few inches off the ground, and was kissing her with as much passion as he could muster.

To hell with the Gryffindors staring at them. To hell with James' splutter of indignation from down the table. To hell with being in the middle of the Great Hall. He had Lily.

Her lips were soft against his, her body soft and warm. She placed her hands on his broad shoulders, making Remus' job a little easier. Her hair was soft, and smelled of rosemary and mint. He smiled into the kiss, feeling happier than he had ever been in his life.

"Mr. Lupin! Miss Evans!" he heard Professor McGonagall shriek.

Lily giggled quietly as they broke away. Remus set her back on her feet and beamed down at her, a foggy memory of the comment he had missed earlier popping into his mind.

"Lily, will you go to Hogsmeade with me?"

"I thought you'd never ask." She smiled, and leaned in to kiss him again.

"So, am I allowed to tell you now just how amazing that shirt looks on you? I couldn't keep my eyes off you all day. Well, that's nothing new, but… More so than usual." Remus flushed a bit, feeling stupid.

Lily chuckled. "Thank you. I was hoping for that. I wore it today just for that purpose." She winked before adopting a very posh, formal accent. "May I join you for breakfast?"

"A lady as beautiful as you is welcome to share my breakfast any time, I assure you," he said, copying her accent.

She shone a 100 watt smile up at him, grabbing his hand and pulling him down to the table along with her.

He squeezed her hand, smiling, thinking that he must be the luckiest man alive.

_Oh yes, _he thought, _Hogsmeade will be fun._

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><p>AN: Thank you for reading! Reviews=Amazing (*nudgenudgewinkwink*)! Next up: Cha-Ching Cherry


	3. ChaChing Cherry

**Disclaimer: Not Mine**

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><p><span>Cha-Ching Cherry<span>

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><p>"So, where to next?" Lily asked, smiling up at Remus.<p>

"Where have we not been," he teased, squeezing her hand gently.

"Um… Well… Good point, that. We've been everywhere! It doesn't seem like we've been in Hogsmeade for that long…"

"Well, you know what the muggles say. Time flies when you're with a beautiful girl." He leaned down and kissed her temple, causing her to turn slightly pink.

"Honeydukes!" she cried after a moment of silent, aimless walking.

"What?"

"We can go back to Honeydukes! We ate all of our chocolate just now in the Three Broomsticks, it'd be a shame to go back up to the castle without any."

Remus grins. "A woman after my own heart. Honeydukes it is."

"Race you!"

"What?"

But Lily was already off, pelting full speed down the road towards Honeydukes.

"Lily!" Remus took off after her, catching up to her easily, despite her head start.

"No fair," she huffed, coming to a stop at the door and pouting ever-so-slightly. "You've got longer legs!"

"Then don't challenge me to a race, love," he whispered, kissing her forehead. "Because I will _never_ let you win." He smiled mischievously at her glare and opened the door to Honeydukes. "Ladies first."

She stepped in and inhaled deeply, shutting her eyes in a look of complete bliss. "I love this place."

"Me too… Come on," he urged, taking her hand and pulling gently. "To the chocolate counter!"

Lily giggled at his childlike enthusiasm and jogged along behind him, taking three steps to every one of his. "Why are you so damned tall?"

"Luck of the genes," he answered absentmindedly, currently caught up in surveying the mountains of chocolate before them.

"Oh my… I can never decide…"

"Me neither… Hmm…" he trailed off, looking pensive, before calling, "Ambrosius?"

"Aye?" replied the owner of the shop, turning in their direction. "Oh, Remus, my boy! Good to see you again. Let me guess, you'll be wanting more samples." He laughed heartily, and the coupling of his white beard and his large, jiggling belly put Lily in mind of the American's version of Father Christmas.

Remus nodded. "Yes, sir."

"The usual, I expect? Doubled? For you and your lovely lass?" Ambrosius winked, grinning widely.

"Yes, please, sir."

"Remus?" Lily whispered, feeling a bit nervous. "What's the usual?"

"What's the usual, she asks!" chortled the candy maker. "Ah, you'll see, lass. Quite the sweet tooth, your young man has, I'll tell you that."

Lily blushed at the phrase "your young man," but smiled nonetheless. "Yes, I know. I have one as well."

"A good thing, that," Ambrosius said, bustling around behind the counter at a speed disproportionate to his large size. Lily attempted to see exactly what he was compiling, but to no avail.

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"Oh, you'll see. Once you see your lad's 'usual.'"

Lily blushed again. Remus wasn't "her lad". Yet. Was he?

As if reading her thoughts, Remus released her hand and snaked his arm instead around her waist. "Don't look so worried," he whispered. "I assure you, you'll love the 'usual.'"

"Here we are," announced Ambrosius, hauling up two large sacks filled to the brim with what looked like one piece of every variety of chocolate in the shop. "Two servings of Remus' usual."

Lily's jaw fell open of its own accord. "_That's_ the usual?"

"That's right, lass." Ambrosius chuckled. "Good thing you have that sweet tooth, eh? I'll be 'round the front if you need anything, Remus. Nice meeting you, Lily Lass." He winked, and was gone.

"Ready?" Remus asked, releasing Lily and grabbing both sacks. Lily couldn't help but notice the way his biceps bulged under the weight.

"How are we supposed to pay for all of this?" Lily regretted the question almost as soon as it was out of her mouth. True, she didn't have all that much, but Remus had even less. She braced herself for Remus to adopt the stony attitude of one who has been offended, but he never did.

He smiled. "I asked Ambrosius the same thing when he first handed one of these to me. He said it was free of charge. He'd seen me eyeing up the chocolate, not able to decide, and he put together a sack with one of everything and handed it over. Said he used to be like me, with a weakness for sweets and a…" he faltered, "limited pocketbook. Course, I insisted on paying him something. Finally, we agreed on two knuts a bag. Says I'm his best, most loyal customer. Great man, Ambrosius…"

Lily nodded slowly, still feeling quite embarrassed for having asked the question.

"Hey," he said softly. "It's okay. No big deal. Don't beat yourself up about it." He smiled gently down at her. "Now let's go eat some chocolate!"

He led her to the front of the store, towards the cashier. "Oh, no…" he muttered, looking down at the sacks. "Lily, could you reach into the right pocket of my jeans and grab four knuts, please? My hands are full."

Lily, blushing profusely, did as she was asked, careful not to let her hand accidentally stray too far to the side.

Ambrosius turned the corner, raising his eyebrows as he caught sight of the placement of Lily's hand. "Honestly, lad, can't it wait till you're out of my shop?" he teased, sidling up to the counter.

Lily blushed, if possible, even deeper, and presented the coins to Ambrosius. He took two and folded her fingers over the remaining two, closing her hand.

"But-" Remus started, but the man waved him away.

"Nah, it's a special day, lad. Never seen you come in here with a lass, least of all such a bonnie one. I had been starting to think you were a bit of a poof." Remus opened his mouth to say something about that, but Ambrosius spoke over him. "Keep your money, lad. Save up for something nice for your lass."

Remus opened his mouth once again, but was silenced by the look the man gave him. "Thank you, Ambrosius."

"Oh wait-" he called to their retreating backs. "See that pink one at the top there, lass? In the bag nearest you?"

Lily nodded.

"Taste that one first. It's new."

Lily nodded again, reaching for the candy and taking a bite. "Mmm… it's delicious, sir!"

Remus smiled at the way she lit up, and couldn't help but notice the bit of chocolate smeared at the corner of her lip. _Well_, he thought_, can't let that go to waste, now, can I? It must be good, to make her smile like that… Hmm… _He smiled unseen by Lily, who was still standing with her eyes closed in a state of bliss. _I'll just have to find out, now, won't I?_

He leaned down and slowly, ever so slowly, pressed his lips to hers. He heard her breath catch and felt a rush of masculine pride flow through his veins. She moved closer to him, pressing herself against him as closely as possible with the sacks of chocolate in the way.

Remus heard the ring of the cash register as Ambrosius deposited the knuts, and pulled away, licking lightly at the chocolate on her lip before leaning away.

"Mmm…" he whispered, smiling mischievously at her stunned expression. "Cherry…"

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><p><strong>AN: While I am not a fan of cherry, I do love chocolate! Next up – Coney Island Cotton Candy!**


	4. Coney Island Cotton Candy

**Disclaimer: Not mine**

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><p><span>Coney Island Cotton Candy<span>

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><p>"Come on, Lily darling, it's Halloween! Expand your sweets intake beyond the realms of mere chocolate and indulge in the delectable delicacies of-"<p>

"Black, if you do not shut it this instant, I swear to Merlin, I'll-"

"Now, now, no need to finger your wand so threateningly, Evans."

Remus snorted at the look of apprehension written across his best friend's face as he eyed Lily's wand nervously.

"I wouldn't have to finger it if you'd shut up."

James and Sirius cracked identical smirks, wiggling their eyebrows in tandem.

Remus rolled his eyes. _Typical_. "Come off it, mate. Leave Lily alone."

Sirius grinned at him from across the table. "Course, Prongs. Moony wants us to leave dear Lilykins alone… Wants us to shut it… That way she won't be fingering anything herse-"

BANG.

The smoke cleared to reveal a triumphant looking Lily and a very hairless Sirius.

Remus, James, and Peter laughed uproariously.

"What? What happened? What's she done to me?" Sirius demanded.

James, tears of laughter filling his eyes, wordlessly handed Sirius a spoon.

Sirius glanced in the reflection and a look of pure horror overcame his expression. "My… My hair! My lustrous locks! They're gone! And- MY EYEBROWS! That little- Merlin's lacy thong, where are my eyelashes? LILY!"

"I warned you," she said mildly, before stuffing her face with more chocolate.

"Put it right! You put it right this instant!"

"You've forgotten the magic word…"

"NOW!"

"Wrong word." With a flash of light, Sirius' nose began to grow, outdoing that of Severus Snape by a good three inches.

"MY NOSE! My gorgeous, aristocratic nose! You little-"

"I wouldn't push your luck if I were you, Black. I know a wonderful Shrinking Hex I'd just love to try out. The girls won't have much to say about you after I-"

"NO! Evans! Lily. Lily darling. Please, please, please, please, please do not do that!"

Lily raised one eyebrow and Sirius threw himself across the table at her, hands clasped before him.

"Please, Lily! I'll do whatever you ask! I'll stop pranking for a whole week! I'll leave the first years alone, I'll stop booby-trapping the Charms corridor, I'll cease my romantic pursuits of McGonagall, I'll stop shagging Marlene McKinnon on your bed – oops, probably shouldn't have said that… I'll stop telling everyone that you're Moony's gay beard, I'll stop trying to get Wormtail to steal your knickers, ANYTHING! Anything you want, and it's yours. I'll even stay big-nosed and hairless, just please don't shrink my bits! I'm sorry!"

Lily blinked for a few moments, stunned into silence.

"This is the part," Remus whispered across the table to his bald friend, "where you run away."

Sirius didn't need telling twice. He was through the double doors and halfway across the Entrance Hall before Lily found her voice.

"M-My _bed_?"

James and Peter, still laughing, nearly fell off the bench at the look on her face.

Remus tried his best to suppress his chuckle. "If it makes you feel any better, he likes to shag Emmeline Vance on mine."

"You," Lily hissed, turning her head slowly to glare at him. "_You_. You let him get away! How could you just let him-"

Remus silenced her with a searing kiss. To his surprise, however, rather than giving in as she usually did under these circumstances, she pulled away, looking disgusted.

"Fairy floss!" she cried, gagging slightly. She jumped to her feet and sprinted out the door, leaving her very confused boyfriend behind.

"Lily?" he shouted, but she kept running, one hand over her mouth.

"Wow, that bad, are you, Moony?" James asked.

Remus glared at him and got to his feet. "I need to go see what's wrong with her…"

"Were you eating fairy floss before you kissed her?" asked an airy voice right behind Remus.

He jumped and spun on the spot to find himself looking down into the petuberant eyes of Yasmeen McDaniels, a Ravenclaw fourth-year with far too much knowledge of others personal lives to be considered normal.

"Er… Yes. I was. Why?"

"She hates the stuff. Check the loos."

"How do you-" Remus started to ask, but she had turned her back on him and walked away without another word. "Well," he said, turning back to James and Peter, feeling utterly bewildered, "you heard her. I'm off to find Lily. See you later."

"Have fun at the loo, Moony!" James called to his retreating back. Remus repressed the urge to send him an obscene hand gesture, and broke into a run. There were many girl's bathrooms to check.

* * *

><p>He found her in the third bathroom he checked.<p>

"Lily?" He followed the sound of retching to the middle stall and pushed it open gently.

"Lily," he murmured softly as he knelt down behind her.

She emerged from the toilet, looking very ill. "I-" Another wave of nausea hit her and she bent back over the toilet, loosing what little dinner she ate.

Remus gathered her hair out of her face and held it back, running a calming hand up and down her heaving back.

"Remus, I-"

"Shh," he whispered, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. "It's okay. I'm here. I'm here…"

She leaned back into his arms for a moment, gasping for air. He continued murmuring comfortingly into her hair as she dove her head back into the toilet, spewing the entire contents of her stomach. Slowly, the retching began to subside, dwindling to the occasional dry heave. Finally, having emptied her stomach completely, she leaned back, resting her head in the crook of his neck.

He kissed her temple, holding her close. He rocked her gently, releasing her hair and running one hand through it soothingly. He muttered a cleansing spell over her and the toilet. After about a minute, she spoke.

"Remus, I-"

"Lily, it's okay."

"No, I'm sorry. Really. It's just… Fairy floss makes me sick. When I was nine, my family took a trip to the United States. We visited Coney Island… a carnival near New York… I used to love fairy floss – they call it cotton candy over there- but I ate so much that day… and now… never again… So sick…"

"Shh." Remus smiled. "The same thing happened with me and pickles. I understand. I'm sorry, I didn't know earlier. I didn't know that kissing you would make you sick…" He trailed off, looking apprehensive.

She smiled up at him and Remus' heart gave a hopeful leap. "It's okay." She leaned in slowly, and Remus' heart began to race, as it did every time she kissed him. She stopped a few millimeters away from his lips. "Just… next time, brush your teeth first."

She laughed at his pout and kissed his cheek, standing and dragging him to his feet. "Come on; let's go up to the common room." She smiled at his glum expression and leaned in to whisper in his ear. "Come see me after you've brushed your teeth."

She winked, and was gone.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Yes, **_**technically**_** boys can't get up the girl's dormitory staircase, but hey. It's Sirius Black- he has **_**got**_** to have some way of getting around those wards. ;-) Next up: the final chapter, Your Villa or Mine?**


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